Motive Matters - How important are limitations?

Motive matters. Compassion will help you value your strengths and your limitations cleanly and accurately.

Hi, friends, Van Benson here. :)

Dr. Taylor Hartman, in his new book, “Playing Life to Win”, writes, “Humble people learn to value both their strengths and their limitations.”
During a recent road trip, Tammy read to me from his book for nearly two entire days. I don't think “Playing Life to Win” is meant to be a quick read. I tried that the first time I read it. I loved it the first time through, but realized, the second time through, that I had missed many very important truths. Learning to “value your strengths AND your limitations” is one of those truths.
What does this mean?????
The first part, “value your strengths”, is the easiest, and perhaps more obvious. This is not to say that most people do this. In fact, one of the most gratifying things we experience as Color Code trainers, is when we see the light bulbs come on in people as they discover…often for the very first time…their innate (inborn) gifts and strengths. Reds realize that they DO have vision. They ARE productive and decisive and efficient. BLUES become aware that they ARE sincere and genuine and love to serve others. WHITES “get” they are smart, and capable and DO see things clearly and accurately. YELLOWS come to understand that they DO impact the world in a positive way, by cheering the rest of us on, with their enthusiasm and optimism.

Placing value on your strengths, and embracing the higher motives of service and love, empowers you to bring your gifts “on purpose”, and “with purpose”.

Humble people embrace AND value, BOTH, their strengths and their limitations…strong>with compassion.


How and WHY would I want to “value” my limitations???


Let’s think about this for a minute.

To place a value on something means, “to assess it’s worth or importance”.

Compassion is “a deep awareness of the suffering of another and the wish to relieve it.”

Having and “awareness” of the suffering of others is at the heart of the “SERVICE” motive.

Here is my current yellow perspective on valuing my strengths and limitations with compassion.

First, as a YELLOW, I must be aware that people are hurting out there. Smiles are highly contagious. The simple act of moving the facial muscles, in order to smile, triggers positive brain chemistry that stimulates the immune system and counteracts feelings of worry and depression. A word of encouragement, a little optimism, genuinely offered, can shine the light of life into a dark circumstance, or mood, of another, thereby relieving “suffering”, if even for a short while. For those of you who have heard me tell the story of my experience with “Dora, the hamburger cook”, you will understand how I am learning to bring “my gifts and strengths” with purpose…and on purpose. (This is a beautiful act of worship to the ONE who gave the gifts and strengths in the first place.)

Think about YOUR CORE COLOR, and consider assessing the worth...the importance... of your gifts and strengths. Consider the suffering of others…and your willingness to relieve it. How do you…or how can you relieve suffering by “bringing YOUR gifts to bless the lives of others”, as my friend Taylor Hartman like to say.

Now…to the less obvious application…valuing my limitations, and embracing them with compassion.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN????????????

As a YELLOW, I do my strengths and limitations automatically. For 50 of my 53 years, I have lived out both, without even thinking about either one. Yes, I am generally happy, enthusiastic, optimistic, innovative, fun-loving, inclusive, and spontaneous. AND…YES, I am totally capable of being disorganized, impulsive, self-centered, unfocused, flighty, undisciplined and obnoxious. (and a few more, as well).

Here is where the going can get tough for the “insecure” me.

HOW DO I ASSESS THE WORTH AND IMPORTANCE OF THE ABOVE LISTED LIMITATIONS??? Compassion... awareness of the suffering of others, and my wish to relieve it, is my best friend and colleague, IF, I am to face the truth about me, and the value...the importance... of my limitations.

IF…I am aware of the suffering of others…AND I wish to relieve it…I will face the fact that being disorganized, impulsive, self-centered, unfocused, flighty, undisciplined, and obnoxious will, in fact, LIMIT my capacity to relieve the suffering of others.

Compassion motivates me to place importance on these limiting behaviors. They become so important, that I must commit to the process of beginning to defy them, and ultimately, over time, and with God’s help, to eliminate them altogether.

WHY?
Limitations are just that…limitations. They limit my effectiveness, as a person, in helping people.

REDS….do you see that being insensitive, arrogant, impatient, and always right is important? Important alright!…IMPORTANT TO ELIMINATE! They limit you from eliminating suffering to the very best of your ability.

BLUES…do you see your self-righteous attitude, unrealistic expectations, moodiness, hard to please, being judgemental and giving LOOONG lectures, is important? Yes,… important to begin to eliminate these things, because they hinder you from alleviating the suffering of others to the very best of your ability.

WHITES…………………OF COURSE, YOU SEE…haha….I know you do…and that is what I love about you.
(For the rest of you…WHITES see how being timid, silently stubborn, unmotivated, shy, uninvolved, and not speaking up, keeps them from helping others to the very best of their ability.)

Strengths and limitations are valuable...important. Maximize your strengths, minimize your limitations. Commit to the process of self control, and self improvement. Serve, love, and help people.

CAUTION: Motive Intelligence...Color Code... awareness..., and maturity is NOT an event. It is a process. It takes time. Be gracious and patient with yourself, and others, as you grow. Love you all!