COLOR CODE Moments and Questions

If you would like to share your COLOR CODE moments or questions, please feel free to write us at motivematters@msn.com.
We will do our very best to share your comments and answer your questions. We will be happy to protect your identity, if you prefer to remain anomynous, just let us know.

Your victories or struggles may help others along this journey of life! YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

Friday, June 20, 2008

One Little Nut!


Motive Matters, a lot!
I knew it was going to happen sooner or later. The main drive belt on my Kubota lawn tractor broke. UGH!

Armed with my hodgepodge assortment of tools, not a one in it’s proper place, I took a deep breath and crawled under the tractor to see what I was up against.

To my dismay, it became apparent that the belly mower would need to come off and be taken out from under the tractor, in order to remove the belt. My mind raced back to the day, 8 years ago, when I purchased the bright, shiny, orange tractor. I distinctly remember the salesman telling me the wonderful benefits of having a “Quick Disconnect” belly mower! Quick…maybe…if you are a certified Kubota mechanic….or GOD!

An hour and a half later my “Quick Disconnect” belly mower was out of the way. As I prepared to remove the belt, it became obvious that one little nut, holding a pulley in place, would need to be removed to install the new belt. “NO PROBLEM”, I said to myself. I reached for my trusty ratchet, lucked out and found the right size socket, popped it into place, rolled over on my back, and slid under the tractor for this fairly simple removal of one little nut.

You are right. It resisted my effort.

“NO PROBLEM. I’ll get my hammer”. After sliding out, getting to my feet, and taking note of the various and sundry pains that were coursing their way through parts of my body I didn’t know existed, I again returned to the object of my “FIXation”, one little nut!

Bang! Bang! Bang! “Hmmmm”. BANG! BANG! BANG! BREAK!
“Got it! Success! It moved. I did it! That's the way to be determined and persevere!”

I put down the hammer and took hold of the ratchet to remove the nut. “What?” I then discovered that what had moved…was the little gears inside the ratchet. Ratches are not engineered to be beat on by hammers, evidently.

"Cheap, no good ratchet!"

“NO PROBLEM, I’ve got another ratchet around here,…“somewhere”.

After repeating the BANG! BANG! BANG! BREAK! process two more times, destroying two more perfectly good ratchets with amazing precision, the thought crossed my mind, “my way is not working so good”. So, I decided to seek some advice from someone more knowledgeable in the affairs of removing one little nut.

The friendly man at our local hardware store provided the knowledge and coaching I needed, and for $12.86, I headed back to my one little nut, armed with what he said was “THE RIGHT TOOL”, to get the job done. It was what is called a 30 inch breaker bar. (For those of you who are tool challenged like me, this is a large, long handle that allows you to get leverage on things…like nuts.)

Again, I crawled under “da owanch twacto”, as my grandchildren call it. I took a deep breath, carefully placed the socket over the nut…….and steeled myself for a mighty push.
To my shock…and amazement…I had hardly began to apply force at all, when the little nut humbled itself… and freely let loose it’s grip on the bolt holding the pulley in place.

For the next few minutes, I lay on my back, sweat dripping, looking like a homeless person needing a shower, unshaven face splattered with grass clippings and dirt clods from the BANG, BANG, BANGING, 30 inch $12.86 breaker bar lying across my chest, staring up at the filthy underbelly of a lawn tractor, pondering the deeper life lesson I had just learned.

Sometimes in life, we all need someone else. Maybe we aren't meant to do life alone.

Sometimes we need someone else, with a little knowledge, and the right tool. We can greatly benefit from all these, IF, and WHEN, we have the humility to admit that our way is not working and we need a little help.

Motive training and The Color Code is a lot like that. At the 25 year mark of our marriage, we were banging on our ratchets trying to fix the nut we just happened to be married to. The understanding of MOTIVE, and what drives me and my wife, at the core, helped us to leverage our strengths, to begin to remove the obstacles to a successful relationship. Note: I said remove the obstacles, not the relationship itself. Tragically, to often, our culture and our society today is practicing “throw away” marriage. If something is broken in the marriage, just throw it away and get a new one. This is expensive, and a tremendous waste of family, history, and resources. (There are times when removing from the relationship is the best thing, such as when there is abuse.)

Effort will always be required. But with the power of knowledge, and the right tool, effort can be efficiently applied with a successful result. I often tell struggling couples who are wondering if Color Code will help, “If your way is working, stick with it!”. “If it is not, perhaps we can give you some knowledge and provide you with the right tool that will help”. The same principle applies to professional relationships in the corporate world in which we train.

Tammy and I do our Color Code work everyday. We are both married to a human who can be sort of “nutty” at times. But with God’s help and the right tool, we are able to create great relationships. And as you know….Life is all about relationships!

1 comment:

michelle said...

Love your analogy although I don't know for sure which was the nut lol. You are definitely blessed with the ability to get your message across in a fun and enthusiastic way. No lecturing>>> sorry blues. Michelle